It's time for me to take a break, maybe?
But being sick is awful.
I still have so many things to take care of. Argh.

Not a single thought of abandoning hope!

Today i poured my heart out and am so blessed and humbled by the message shared by my leader during cell group meeting. Really felt that whatever he said was for me and to me. Kind of a great encouragement for all of us to rise up to a brand new level.
My faith got shaken as I began to choose to stay convicted to where i belong, and serve people in greater ways. I don't know if i'm doing it right, but by faith, i believe whatever that comes around, it's not by sheer coincidence, but a purpose :)

My life is really like a piece of clay now. Pressed hard on every side with the commitments in school, family and friends, but i will not be crushed. And who knows the pressure i am feeling now is moulding me into a person of better shape! (not literally of course)

Yesssss! No wonder people say life is like a battlefield. It's either you are prepared to fight on, or you are just preparing to lose. And i feel that it's so easy to feel so tired of everything and give up all that you were once striving for. But when comes to picking oneself up, it's yet so so so tough.

I agree with what my PE teacher said about long distance run, it's really not about how talented you are in running and not so much of how strong your stamina is, it's really your will. By keeping focus on the path you are running, each step you take is definitely not a painful and tiring one, it will be a step out of your comfort zone because even when you feel like collapsing, your will gave you courage to strike out yet another step forward :)

This reminds me that...i'm taking part in 3000m event and 4 x 100m team relay for sports day! Quite excited yet anxious at the same time. It's my first time taking part in a 3000m event! With all my friends' support, no doubt there's a little bit of pressure, i will finish the race no matter what. First or last, it doesn't really matter right? Well, nobody said being last is the loser, but if you quit, you are the loser.

Oh yes, did i mention i am working on my studies as well. Crucial year. Not a time to take things so easy. But not too seriously as well la. I mean, striking a balance between work and play is extremely important agree? :)

At the end of the day, my main goal is to honour my parents with a good deserving future and a positive attitude towards life and people :)

If you happen to feel the same way as me, three words for you, GO FOR IT!

Ok, that's about all i have to say for now. Wow long post. Shall turn in soon :) Oooh for those dear ones who have been concerned about my spine and bone problem, no worries, i have an appointment with the doctor tomorrow soooo, let's just pray that i'll get treated and healed very soon!

But right now, A cheerful heart is (really) good medicine! :)
Friends, I am doing the best i can :)

Today was really a bad day in disguise!
Just when i thought that "There goes my day..." this morning when the bus took so long to come, many unpleasant things happened on the bus, was late to meet rach and mich, missed the train, lost my balance on the train and knocked someone... today turned out to be a happy happy day!

I laughed alot today, no actually i laugh alot everyday, but today, maybe because lessons weren't that taxing, so all the not so good things that happened this morning totally didn't affect my mood for the entire day.

oh oh! the year ones are here!!! I don't know if i should smile or sigh. Regardless, i still welcome them with open arms :)
But then again, something all of us, year twos dread is the crowd in the canteen, busstops, everywhere!! Meaning longer queues and shorter time for break, and more packed areas along the corridors, squeezy squeezy...):
But of course i am not complaining or blaming anyone, haha, i'm just stating a casual remark :)
I saw a few SC girls!!! :D that's one of the joyous part for today!
I will find another chance to talk to them personally :)

Did i mention that i love my friends alot?
I don't care, i want to say again!!
Friends are truly God's blessings :)
I will treasure these blessings.

You can really be happy if you want to. Even if you feel crushed outwardly, your inward spirit never crumbles.

My head feels so heavy.
Feels as if there's a big big stone inside my head.
Feverish.

My back lacks support.
Feels like i am spineless.
Back sores.

I need to study, i need to do my homework, i need to solve problems, i need to talk to people, i need energy to play, i need to PUSH MYSELF.

Everyday is a happy day despite its shagness :)
Because of the company of good friends in an environment i feel confortable in.
Sooooooooo, i look forward to everyday of school with such happiness.
When i focus on the happiness, my physical discomfort seem so small :)

Yet, there's something in me that longs for some words of encouragement from any sincere person.

Are you really interested?

Sometimes i get the feeling that i mean so little to some people as a friend. Maybe there are really more important things in your life. Perhaps?

I want to talk.
You said you will listen.
Then when i want to talk.
You want to do something else.
I said it's okay then.
Then you told me you thought i wanted to tell you something.
???
In the end, i really don't feel like talking anymore.

I believe everybody experienced this in some way or another? Well at least you know you are not the only one feeling in such a way.
Mann, okay.

At the end of the day, at the depths of the earth, i still know that i mean alot to Jesus and Jesus definitely means alot to me :)

Hey, I think I've met you before!

Hahaha yesterday i made a new friend again! She's two years younger than me, and when i introduced myself, i knew that she was not shy to strangers.
Then i sensed that she kept looking at me somehow. I don't know. Just felt that she was staring at me, even as i am talking to some others.
Yes then suddenly, she said that she think she saw me somewhere before. On a bus or something.
But then the funny thing is, she can't remember what bus was it, where and when it took place. Then i burst out laughing because it's either i have another look-a-like or the world is seriously quite small. And wow she has wonderful memory of recognizing people she came across with :)

Haha okay my point is, such a small world we live in!
Isn't it true that the friends we have are somehow friends of another friend you know! It's like everybody is connected to each other in some way.
Hah! This reminds me of Globalisation.
Ok right, anyway, i think making friends really widens your social circle and also your networks to the rest of the world!

So, try to let down your hair once in awhile and go out there to make a new friend!

Believe me, you are helping me by allowing me to carry your burdens.

Wow today i am reminded once again that great talent without faith has no impact.
Faith is a sacrifice.
So with great talent, yet without making any sacrifices, there's no difference between you and mediocrity. You will just stay ordinary, because in other words, you are not using your talent to the fullest.

If a friend who is feeling down calls you up and needs somebody to talk to, if you can put aside whatever you are doing, no matter how busy you are, how inconvenient it is, well that is sacrifice.
I guess sacrifice really makes a person more tolerant and more sensitive to the needs of people.

I really really want to embrace a lifestyle of sacrifice! And it doesn't mean it will be a torture or anything. It just means giving time and effort, even if it means to suffer, i believe it's still a worthy and honourable act of servanthood.

Ok, i really feel i need to learn to manage my time more wisely.
It's so easy to get distracted and lose focus, that's human nature huh. But i think if you got your goals all set, your self-motivating factor constantly by your side, truthfully, gearing up will not be a problem.
So, let's work together to fulfill our goals, whether it's a shared goal or a personal one, because i know nobody likes regrets :)

CHEMISTRY TEST ON MONDAY.
ALL THE WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

Be strong and take heart, and wait for the Lord.

HAHA rachel and i have been calling michelle 'weirdo' and 'freak' for i-don't-know-what reason. hahaha mann michelle is really quite annoyingly hilarious at times.
it's not a bad thing mich! (if you are reading this) It entertains people :)

this week had been one of the most exhausting week since 2010 started.. perhaps it's just the pretty strenuous PE.
Maybe i'm just unfit, or maybe because of another reason, I feel much weaker than last year. Now, just a few sets of execises, and i get really tired already.
But i did do regular workouts during the holidays so...Sigh, probably signs of aging.

Recently, i can't sleep because of the pain in the back. So if you see me with eyebags or puffy eyes or whatever, it's not that i am deprived of sleep, it's because i can't get to sleep with all the discomfort.
People tell me sleeping is the best way to stop thinking of your troubles, but now i can't even get to sleep.
but then again, with all these problematic issues in my life, i shall stop asking God why do i have so many problems, what did i do to deserve such burdens, instead i have found the purpose for everything. By no means to weaken me, but to strengthen me.

I am in a sudden mood to write songs again!
I think it's good to express yourself in different ways :)

I shall rejoice for every blessing and hardship! Nothing is impossible!

I am really blessed with such wonderful friends!

When things can't get any better, i look at these lovely faces and it'll remind me how i held on so hard in the first place. Why would i even try to give in? :)

Thank God I have made my most important decision! I do hope it's a wise one :)
I have decided to walk the narrow way, the more inconvenient way, the harder way out, faithfully!

Thank you to all who encouraged me in one way or another! Every word you listened and speak will be kept close to heart... :D

selfless sacrifices are worth because we live to love.

I have to make an extremely important decision very soon.
And this probably the main reason why i'm stressing out these days.
Oh God.
Really hope this will come to pass soon :)

It occurred to me lately that love really do transcends all boundaries!
The feeling of caring for the ones you love, helping them when a need arises and loving them despite of our differences is really a great great feeling.
Even occasional how are yous are simple gestures of your concern for somebody.
I think it's really not that difficult to be nice :)
It's just a matter of choosing to be others-centered or self-centered person.

Have been praying for three good friends of mine in particular again and again. For breakthroughs in their health and studies.
I believe my prayers are answered :)