Thank you, faithful servant.

I went through glorifying moments these past 2 weeks.
Hectic schedules but very fruitful :)
Christmas was a season of pure joy and LOVE!
Had a most splendid time with family and friends and of course, an abundance of praise to celebrate Jesus' birthday!
That's what Chirstmas is all about right ;)

Thanksgiving Chalet is the most heart-warming event of every year personally.
Seeing how all of us broke our heart and poured out our emotions of giving thanks and appreciation, never once failed to touch my heart greatly.

I have grown defintely. And it's really a nice feeling when somebody thank you for something you did for them, whether a big or small thing, because it is something that really matters to them.
I am truly so very grateful.

E405 is really a home I can take refuge in, whenever and whatever it is.
one day if the world is against me, i'll come home :)

i feel myself rising up to another level of breakthrough this coming new year.
a dear friend of mine just reminded me that i may be pressed on everyside, burdened and what not, but i am not crushed.

:)

Bring it on, trials.

why are you afraid? O you of little faith.

I am currently reading this book that ting gave me for my birthday. Pretty interesting.

i'm not yet to the end of the book, actually not even half of the book, but there's one part i want to share.

Fear is a perceieved loss of control.

The more insecured we feel, the meaner we become.

Because we feel cornered.

wow isn't it true! i'm sure all of us felt this way before.

a few days ago, i was dreaming about my 白马王子 which was kinda strange because i never felt that way before.

forget about that, anyway i have recently decided to slow down the pace of my life.

Saw the harshness of life, and the beautiful side of it as well.

And, i realised i have became more tolerant. A nicer word is understanding i guess.

Like those people giving out flyers in your neighbourhood, i observed the people passing by, some rudely showed signs of irritation, most ignored their presence and some simply grab it from their hands and shoved it into the nearest bin. Very few actually take it and see what the flyer really is about.

if everybody continues to act in such a manner, wouldn't the company producing these flyers be wasting their money on printing and finding manpower to distribute the flyers.

and isn't it wrong if we show signs of irritation when they are simply doing their job. i mean, okay, if you are really rushing to somewhere and you don't want to be disturbed, i think the only kind thing to do is to give a wave and say no thanks.

afterall, these distributers don't owe you a living, so what's with the sulky face. heh.

The above is one major example i experienced as i slowed down my pace in life.

i think it's good to stop whatever you are doing once i awhile and see how you can really contribute to the goodness of mankind.

i made a mistake in the past, because i am not afraid to tell you the truth that i am actually one of the most who simply ignore the presence of the flyer distributer.

but now, i would really want to uphold the lesson i have learnt and to understand every detail of the situation before i have negative thoughts about it.

LIFE IS REALLY FAIR (actually).

and no, life do not suck.

Rebel.

The more inconvenient the situation is, the more i want to challenge it.
The more unfair things get, the more i want justice.
The more it gets on my nerves, the more i want to stay calm.
The more barriers there are on my path, the more i want to kick them aside.
The more trying it gets, the more i want to fight against it.

Thank you.

15th December. I had my BIG day!
This year, God has been kind to me, I've got THREE consecutive days of celebration for my birthday!
13th Dec - 15th Dec. JOY.

Went to KTV on 14th to celebrate michelle and xuxun's birthday.
Great time of singing and bonding :)
sadly, 3 hours is not enough. At least 5 hours in KTV is more satisfying. heh.

Big day,
ting, zhenyi and teen came over to my place. Bought soooo much food!!
All the sweet desserts, tarts and all the cakes.
ooh mama, tooth fairy save me.
Then head off to Bugis at 4pm to meet esther, suyi, jingru and yingshuen.
And to my most delightful surprise, after i came back to pastamania from the washroom, they sang me a birthday song with the birthday cake!
Everybody in pastamania turned to my direction. Awkwardness but i was really really touched.
I so didn't expect that to come from them!

Since my curfew was kinda extended, we went to vivocity to hang out through the night.
Went up to the rooftop and chatted, played pranks (sorry to those who got pranked) and dares.
Got a little bored so we decided to go to the arcade!

As the night grew cold, it was time to go home.
Reached home at 11 plus and washed up, all ready for bed when mummy said she've got a birthday cake for me!
So she litted the candles and celebrated the end of my big day :)
A nice peppermint cake.

Wow, not only was 15th December a sweet day for me, it was a sweet day for my tastebuds.
Surely i'll gain weight. But in exchange for all the company and love, a few more pounds is nothing.

This birthday, i received lots of wishes and awww-messages from many people, even friends whom i ain't that close to. I am really very thankful and i can't name all of you sweet people here.
But i sincerely thank you so very much<3

I appreciate it alot and i thank you for appreciating me too.
Man, I feel loved.

Isn't it true that when you use all of your heart to love somebody and treat him well, that love will be given back to you someday, especially when you least expect it.
And i am certain there are really people out there who loves you for who you are.
I trust in God and Mankind :)

A toast to you! May all the birthday wishes you gave me be returned to you!

I HAD THE MOST AMAZING SUNDAY FOR MONTHS <3

went for cell group meeting today (!!!), totally phenomenal!
i really feel so so so loved today, can't express my thanks and gratitude through mere words.
i received a great message and a deep impartation on kicking yourself out of self-pity and your comfort zone and to stretch yourself further, reach out and share your experiences and testimonies with everyone!

If you never did share about your life, it's time you do something!
who knows the person you're sharing with will get impacted in some way or another. maybe right? anything is possible!

the cell group celebrated my birthday for me after cgm :)
haha and for the first time, i had to say a short speech!
which i am pretty glad i said it well.
yeah and i love the hugs and handshakes from the girls and guys respectively :) hehe
LOVING PEOPLE <3
and of course the EXTREMELY NICE card and present!
i love the two really pretty BALLOONS :)
Thank you E405 and i love you all the way right deep down from the bottom of my heart.

now i can't wait for Thanksgiving Chalet!
and everything that comes my way.

The celebrations this week is gonna be HECTIC in a most enjoyable way.
celebrated with my family today for the most SCRUMPTIOUS dinner i ever had in ages. Cause it's with my parents and sister!!
Had an awesome jap meal, sushis, ramen and what nots. yum yum yum :)
end up with a heavy and bloated tummy.. hah consequences for eating too much.

I am terribly and awfully (meaning i can't wait!) EXCITED for Christmas!! Hohoho!
Christmas is not only a season of GIVING, but LOVING.
Not just the season of LOVE, but falling in love!
(quoted from city harvest's xmas musical)
i am seriously expecting a great deal of JOY during the Christmas week!
I hope you are as excited as i am!
because you will certainly be missing out if you aren't! i promise!

Let's be JOLLY friends!

"Hi miss! Have a nice day!"

Went for lunch with rachel today and her house thereafeter with michelle.
The funny thing that happened today was pretty strange, and weird.

As we were walking towards the traffic light to cross to the other side, a man, in his 20s i suppose walked from nowhere (behind us i think), and had a little conversation with us.

Man: "Hi miss! Have a nice day!"
Us: *stares blankly* (with raised eyebrows)
Man: (walks in front now and turned back abruptly)
"I know you think i'm weird right?"
Us: *well...yes* (continues to stay speechless and give him blank look)
Man: "Well..ya..er Have a nice day!"
Us: *giggles* "Thanks (?)"
Man: (smiles and walks off)
Us: (control laughter)

yes, this was it. goodness me, what an encounter.
but he was nice, being overly friendly i guess :)
hahaha and made my day a little brighter!

sleepless nights.

I have been staring at this for so long and it's the first time i don't know how to start my post, or should i say i don't know what to write.
i know deep down i have alot of thoughts, alot of emotions, but maybe i just can't seem to express it out..
i think those who know me well enough, you will be able to understand.

too many things have happened recently.
and it's not as if i can't handle the stress, it's just too quick! and shocking!

several unexpected things happen one after another this week.
no matter how strong you are, i don't think you will be able to withhold.

I need God's Grace.

relief.

i had a close to death experience on 7th December 2009.
two extreme emotions.
came back from a happy occasion, ting's birthday.
big heated argument with parents.
agitated but not the angry kind.
more of a panic attack.
hyper-ventilated.
heart beating so fast i could hardly count.
chest pain.
i can't breathe.
racing against time.
2 mins.
i really can't breathe.
5mins.
parents thought i was fooling around.
i can't breathe. help me.
8mins.
dad helped me up and gave me a glass of warm water.
went to back of kitchen and laid on the floor.
my body cramped up.
i can't breathe.
mum wanted to call ambulance.
but i said i should be okay by putting plastic bag over mouth.
tried to calm down.
took in deep breaths.
sister came home and calmed me down.
10mins.
recovery period.

i serioulsy thought oh no, this is over for me.
no one can understand how scary it was.
thank god i still remained hopeful to hang on.
the plastic bag saved me(:
and i'm going to the doctor later for X-Ray for my back.
and apparently after this terrible incident, my mum says i need go for heart check up as well.

and ting is right, even though sometimes your spirit is strong, your physical body is weak.
and when you are so close to death, you wouldn't be thinking of studies, school, problems and whatever.
you will probably think of the people and things you love.

thank you ting for being there through my recovery period.
couldn't have felt better without you.
and all those who sent me messages of concern.
appreciate it very much :)

don't neglect your health people!

Dr Joint!

what an eventful day.
no i didn't run for the marathon.
i went as a volunteer! those unsound heroes that you hear about, haha that's us.
just kiddin. but seriously, our job ain't easy.
and it's duper exhausting! not to mention i was soooo sleepy.
could really knock off any moment. but of course, must do my duty.

an experience of a lifetime definitely. an inspirational one i'd say.
somehow you will just feel somewhat encouraged by the runners, with the kind of persistent and keep-going attitude they carry throughout the race, it's simply admirable.

my sister took part in the half-marathon race!
really proud of her(:
completed her race in 2 hours 5 mins! not bad huh ;)

alright, i am expecting a great week by faith :)
COME WHAT MAY.

Grace & Mercy

As i was in the midst of worrying about some people (as usual), this poster plastered to the wall of the hotel i was in for my holiday, caught my attention. I don't know if it's just a mere coincidence, but i choose to believe otherwise.

In any case, it came very timely as a reminder for me and i'm glad i sat at that particular chair that morning. If it isn't for the position of that seat, I wouldn't be able to see this Reminder.

The richest could be the poorest on the inside.

rachel and michelle recommended sad korean songs to me yesterday and i am craving for more :)
there's one thing about korean songs, you might not understand a single word of it but somehow strangely, you will still be able to feel the emotions - seldom happiness though.
most korean songs i know are the really depressing ones.
those agonized miseries and what nots.

not that i am depressed or anything, but i really love these kind of heart-warming or say, heart-wrenching songs :)

looking at my calendar, wow a whole lot of december babies!
december is my happiest and busiest month.
and i can honestly say i spend more time doing birthday cards than doing my holiday assignments...heh.

i am getting so sick of seeking things that are beyond my control.
i know nothing is impossible but i don't like telling myself it's okay when i know it's not. sometimes when you have become the 'it's okay' type of person, it's hard to change out of it.

it seems tough to be able to withhold everything and it just makes you seem as if you are really a strong person simply because you don't want to burden others with your problems.
but i realised that this will only make you weaker, not stronger in any way. And defintely not making others less worried for you.
it's so hard to live up to the expectations of others, what more your own expectations.
it's time i learn to trust the little so that i can be trusted for the much :)

Spending time with friends is always a yes-yes, never a no-no :)
feels great to celebrate qiaohua's belated birthday and emelia's birthday with friends today and simply to catch up on life!
really happy to see shihan after 3 weeks!!
that's pretty long considering the fact that we used to see each other everyday.

went to play bowling for the very first time!
splendid experience!
never knew that bowling could be that fun! well, the company played a big part too :)

ok, i am tired so i shall sleep soon!
love you all.